I'm No Rose
by The Shipping Cap'n
Summary: Amethyst would do anything for Pearl but she can't keep doing -this-
A large purple hand spread across the smooth skin of a thin woman's sleeping face.

The slumbering woman smiled, nuzzling unconsciously into the touch before it quickly retracted, blankets being pulled around the thin shoulders of the sleeping form soon after by the same lavender hand.

"You can't keep doing this, Amethyst. It will only hurt you."

"I know Garnet… I just don't know what else to do anymore…"

Garnet sighed from her seat next to Amethyst. Pearl had passed out some time ago from her and Amethyst's "quality time" a.k.a. Amethyst once again shifting into Rose and doing what could only be described as sating the ancient knight's corrupted need for love. Knowing this, Garnet had taken it upon herself to finally check on the two.

Amethyst grunted with a little bit of pain, ignoring the hassles that came with shape shifting back after such an extended use of it. As her form finally stabilized she was caught by the steadying hand of Garnet as she swayed. She was dangerously close to passing out herself but quickly shook it off and offered her worried leader a smile. It was safe to say that this new form of "treatment" so to speak for Pearl had done her wonders. No longer did she snap at Amethyst for trivial things, choosing instead to almost follow her every whim whether or not Amethyst actually wanted it. While tensions had subsided for the most part, Garnet and Amethyst both knew that this was only a bandage at the most to the underlying problems within Pearl's psyche.

It didn't start like this of course, but over time Pearl had gotten almost addicted to the new coping mechanism that came with this "game" of theirs. It had gotten to the point that at times Pearl would even follow Amethyst around, heeding each and every one of Amethyst's simplest statements with devotion akin to that of what she gave Rose herself. If only to persuade Amethyst to change into her. Garnet had suggested they take a break, but at this Pearl became incredibly vindictive, choosing to go silent and not even acknowledge Amethyst until she was Rose once more. She eventually even started requesting Amethyst to walk around for days on end as Rose when Steven wasn't present. Of course Steven was none the wiser, staying over at Connie's or hanging out with his dad for days seemed perfectly fine with him. He was too sweet and naïve to even wonder why Pearl and Amethyst had become oddly absent in the sendoff goodbyes.

"How are you feeling? Does your form hurt?"

Garnet had laid Amethyst on a heated rock deep in the core of the temple, a place she often resided to think herself in times like this. The rock did wonders to soothe a ragged form, and the normally fatal heat was merely a calm warmth to the technically immortal gems who used it.

"Nah, I'm ok now, I think it's just when I use it too long that it really hurts to change back. Thanks, G."

Garnet simply hummed in response, never once stopping her constant kneading of the smaller gem's back. She knew Amethyst was in more pain than she let on, but she didn't see anything visibly wrong with her, nor her form, so she chose to let it slide… For now…

"Try to sit up for me, let me check you over." She stated simply. She wanted to sound gentler, but it seemed she couldn't quite get it because Amethyst grunted as she rushed getting up, as if commanded.

She realized as she looked into Amethyst's eyes that she was in a different place. And as she continued to order the gem to do this and that she found she obeyed with almost a sickening speed, despite her form's protest.

"How quickly does Pearl make you do things?"

Amethyst simply shrugged, finally having a little more light to her eyes as she came out of her daze, still not following where Garnet's question was going she answered slowly. "Uhm… I dunno… I have to be fast, Pearl hates correcting me in general but when I'm Rose she wants it to be as quick as possible so it feels "seamless" or whatever." Garnet's gaze had hardened as she continued speaking, her eyes twitching as Amethyst unknowingly went on saying how Pearl even had her practice when she was alone so they could have entire scenes planned out so as to make it as real as possible in Pearl's eyes.

Finally she reached a hand out, clenching Amethyst's shoulder far harder than she had meant to and startling her, before correcting her harsh hold into a softer one.

"Amethyst…"She started, steadying her voice as it tried to betray her emotions. "Please, do you… Why do you do this?" She finally said, choosing her questions carefully.

Amethyst eyed her curiously, "What do you mean? Do what?"

Garnet snapped, suddenly erupting, clearly frustrated with Amethyst's lack of understanding. "Why do you do _this_ , this _Rose_ _thing_? Why do you do this to yourself, do this to and for Pearl…. How do _you_ feel about it? What do you even get out of this? You know this is hurting you _and_ Pearl… This is only a temporary fix, eventually Pearl will get to the point where she can't even stand any of us unless "Rose" is here. But what about _you_?"

She wanted to say more, but she felt her shoulders shake, her thoughts were racing a thousand miles an hour. Garnet attempted to stop them from coming, but she kept seeing images of the future flooding in her head until all she could see were possibilities of how this _could_ and eventually _would_ go horribly wrong. If this continued she was sure she'd even go mental. And no matter how hard she had tried, she couldn't see a single possibility were this continuing could be a good thing.

Amethyst sat back in shocked silence, trying to process everything Garnet had demanded to know from her. She went to yell at her for feeling like she had to care so much about something that wasn't her business but she gulped back her responses, seeing Garnet staring at her with an unreadable expression. After a long debate inside her own self, Garnet took a deep breath, and pulled off her visor, turning to Amethyst with tear filled eyes. Her third eye was wide and unmoving, flashing with held back visions as it strained wildly against them from its place on her forehead before Garnet shut it with a wince.

"I know you love her Amethyst… I _know_ you do… After you're done with her, or _she's_ done with _you_ … I _see it_ , I do. You look at her… you look at her and you don't _want_ to leave."

The normally stoic gem looked to the side, almost talking to herself as if in a memory from long ago. "You look at her for everything, good _and_ bad that she is. You _love_ her…. But this, _**this is not love Amethyst**_ … What she does to _you_ , to _herself_ … This is _wrong_ …. You're not taken care of, you're not asked how _you_ feel, or if _you_ want this… And yet you do it? _**Why**_?!" Her shoulders shook violently as she screamed out the last word. It echoed off the stone walls and fell into a thick silence as her "talk" ended. Garnet wasn't sure when she stood, but now, she towered over her small form glaring, shoulders still shaking as she cried openly.

"I've been alive…. For thousands and _thousands_ of years, Amethyst. And I've seen so _many_ awful things that people and gems alike have done in the sake of "love." This is not love Amethyst. I don't want to lose Pearl either, but is _this_ better?" She saw Amethyst look down, her bangs covering her eyes with a dark shadow as she sat, refusing to answer. She huffed in frustration, wanting to demand an answer. Finally, she left instead, tired of talking. She hadn't spoken this long, much less this passionately, in what felt like centuries. But she had said all she could say without erupting further on the now silent gem behind her. She didn't want to leave it like this, and as she left she almost stopped and returned. She kept walking though, unsure of what lay ahead of them. Refusing to look to the future, refusing to think of anything as she left. Unaware of the cost not returning would have on them. Amethyst's words ringing in her head as she faded out of sight.

… _I just don't know what else to do anymore…_

The next day had started as any other day used to. Steven woke and sleepily made his way downstairs, ready for some breakfast. He was half way across the living room, sleepily rubbing an eye and preparing to say "good morning" to whoever was around, when he suddenly tripped over something.

He sat up quickly on his hands and knees, looking at the offending obstacle. His suitcase lay open on the floor, random necessities already halfway packed inside. At this point he knew what it was for, but it didn't stop the sleepy child from getting upset and confused quickly. He scanned the room and saw Garnet at the stove, turning the burners on and putting her hands in the rising heat tensely, something he only saw her do when she was close to snapping at someone. Amethyst was nowhere to be seen and as he continued his search he heard the warp pad activate.

Pearl stepped off the pad primly, making her way with a large laundry basket towards his suitcase. She paid no mind to its jostled contents and simply redid her work, almost as if on autopilot as she continued to pack his clothes once it was sorted out.

"Pearl, why are you packing my stuff again?" He received no response, though he noticed Garnet clicked her tongue and grunted something angrily under her breath. An almost shaky hand reaching out quickly and further turning up the heat to the stove before she stilled in front of it once more.

"P-Pearl? I just got back from the last sleepover with Connie, and I mean….. Dad loves having me over anytime but it's getting a bit much to make it _every_ other day isn't it?" He tried to chuckle at the last part, but nothing swayed Pearl as she only hummed absentmindedly, folding his shirts into even tinier squares as she packed faster. His face scrunched up worriedly, he tried calling her name again, but still received no response. Sweat now trickled lightly down his brow as he continued trying. It seemed each time she'd just hum a little louder and Garnet would turn the stove up more. Finally he had had enough, his brow furrowing as he yelled, "Pearl!" Pearl's head snapped up, and she honed her wide blue eyes with a slight sense of vacancy at the worried boy, seemingly still in her own world as she let out another distant hum and replied. "S-Steven…. What's wrong?" Steven balked, tears brimming slightly in his eyes as he pushed his shoulders forward, shutting his eyes and yelling, "What's wrong? What's wrong?! I just got back and you're already packing me up again! I didn't mind you guys sending me away every now and again- I thought it was just to let me have fun or something! But now you're sending me off back to back! It's like… It's like you don't want me here anymore…."

Pearl had stopped packing Steven's things, her shoulders tensed tightly. Her eyes held merely small blue pupils that glanced back and forth shakily at Steven and the shirt clutched in a death grip in her hands. " _Answer_ me!" Steven screamed. "You're ignoring me like you don't even want me to _exist_! What's happening? Why is Garnet acting weird? Where is Amethyst? Why won't _either_ of you say goodbye to me anymore? Is it gem stuff? Is something happening? _**OR IS IT ME**_?!"

" _ **ENOUGH**_!"

Everyone, even Garnet, looked up and towards the sound of the voice.

Amethyst stood in the Temple doorway, one hand clutching the siding so hard it was a wonder the ancient structure didn't crack as she glared through slitted eyes at the group.

Her eyes honed in on Pearl, who visibly shrunk back. Emitting a small peep of fear as she saw the danger glinting in those normally relaxed violet eyes.

"Pearl." She started quietly, trying not to growl as much as she did as she almost spat the taller gem's name. She loved her, she did. This, however, was _too far_. "Unpack Steven's things _right_ now, and get out of here."

Pearl stiffened, her eye twitching dangerously as she righted herself from her hunched back position on the floor. "I-I can't! He needs to _leave_ Amethyst, you know this!"

Amethyst laughed bitterly, not even glancing to see Garnet's reaction to all this as she stated plainly, each word dripping with false innocence. "Oh? He does, does he? Why Pearl? Why does he need to leave _EXACTLY_?" She had started to walk slowly towards Pearl, her form shifting slightly as she got closer to the now completely cowering gem before her. Her heart was screaming at her not to do this, and she heard Garnet even shout her protests, having seen this coming already with her future vision. She persisted though, and soon she was taller, heavier. A large flat disk had started to form on her stomach and her hair went from unruly and wild to luscious large curls that bobbed angrily behind her. She was morphing too quickly too soon after her last ordeal she knew, but she couldn't stop now. Even as her form glitched out of focus dangerously. "Why does he need to leave Pearl? Why can't he stay? Why can't _I_ stay? Why does Garnet practically want to _kill_ you half the time now? _Why can't you love me like you loved_ _**her**_?!"

She stood directly before Pearl now, and glanced around at the figures below her. She was tall, taller than even Garnet by a head or so. She was the perfect, though lavender, visage of the "late" Rose Quartz herself.

She felt so much rage inside her, and knew it showed on her face as well. Garnet stood, mouth agape and hands shaking as she sat back on the burners with them. The heat long since turned off as she shook silently, all three eyes wide yet hidden behind her visor. She glanced at Steven quickly, he was in no better state, having already seen this form when she had used it against Greg. Now however, he was seeing it in a whole new, even sicker, light. Amethyst turned away from him, stomach churning and rage boiling over as she looked to Pearl, who she knew this would hurt the most.

Pearl was lost, pupils shrunk to their smallest capacity as they trembled violently back and forth, never having seen, nor wanting to see the face of the woman she loved and had countlessly _died_ for looking at her like _this_. Her hands clutched at themselves painfully and twitched with absolute fear as she shrank into a ball, her knees pulled up by her chin as she sat back from the angry enigma towering above her.

"R-R-Rose-"

" _ **I AM NOT ROSE!"**_ Amethyst bellowed, her rage shaking her form to its very core as she screamed her voice raw. Her form glitched out of focus painfully and she winced, gripping her side.

Garnet shook her head quickly, dismissing her own thoughts and feelings as she dashed almost madly towards them. She scooped Steven up along with his still only half way packed things and charged all the way to Greg's van, almost slamming the door open with the force of her knocking. Soon she was shoving the traumatized boy she had cradled in her arms into Greg's hands, only trusting her voice to offer a tense, "Keep him safe," before leaping off. Heading with all her speed back towards the temple.

She felt as though no time had passed since she left, but she stood there, frozen in place, when she saw what things had escalated to upon returning.

Pearl was on the floor flat now as Amethyst sat on top of her, pounding her chest angrily and screaming bits and pieces at her unintelligibly as she cried heavily. Her form glitched from her own to Rose's and Garnet watched as Pearl laughed hysterically, crying herself as her mind apparently went out the window. She wasn't even asking Amethyst to stop, she simply took each hit, stray ones knocking her head back and forth as they caught her jaw. Her head snapping this way and that as she lost what was left of her sanity. In her eyes, it _was_ Rose hitting her, she reasoned that she must have done _something_ wrong, she felt she deserved it and was ready to _die_ at the hands of her "Rose" if it meant being loved and wanted again. Whether or not she actually deserved this was out of the question at this point. The beating was so severe that her nose had long since started bleeding, teal blood pouring over bruised cheeks and mixing with her spit and tears. It flowed steadily along and down off her jaw with the blood dripping from deep gashes on her face as the beating continued.

Amethyst's hands were soaked with the glowing substance as she continued her rampage, her rationality also depleted to nothing as she continued. Her form was twitching more frequently as pain both physical, and emotional, overwhelmed her. It was as if she couldn't be stopped, nothing reached her as she lashed out madly.

She was in the arc of another swing at Pearl's face when she heard Pearl choke out. "I…. I love you Rose."

Her form finally twitched a final time, light flicking out of cracks in her face and body here and there as it shuddered and gave out. Amethyst threw her head back in pain and screamed, tears streaming out of her eyes and swirling with Pearl's blood on her face as she collapsed in a ball of twitching light.

An Amethyst gem landed with a heavy thunk off to the side of Pearl, who in turn had finally collapsed upon herself as well, retreating to her gem to regenerate. All that was left was a glowing puddle of blood mixed heavily with tears from the two love torn gems. Garnet shakily made her way towards the mess with careful, slow steps. She fell to a knee in front of the scene, touching both gems gently, checking for permanent damage. She made sure the gems were ok before clutching them to her chest, finally allowing her own tough face to break as she realized things might never be ok with their group again.

One gem wanted love.

And one gem couldn't let the old love go.

And it had twisted and broken them.

Leaving their team….

Their _family_ …..

….Torn apart…..


End file.
